


Volunteer

by melimarron



Series: Peeta Mellark Character Study Compilation [1]
Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Character Study, POV Peeta Mellark, Pre-Canon, and i just watched a youtube clip of the reaping in the movie, and that is the extent of my research, but i wanted to do this, i haven't read the books in years, mostly - Freeform, so yep
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:14:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26246992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melimarron/pseuds/melimarron
Summary: Peeta Mellark is five when he meets Katniss, eleven when he saves her life, and sixteen when the two of them are sentenced to death together.(Or, a character study of Peeta Mellark.)
Series: Peeta Mellark Character Study Compilation [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1920007
Comments: 5
Kudos: 22





	Volunteer

Peeta Mellark isn’t used to being in the spotlight.

He’s the youngest of three boys, and really, the only thing that ever made him stand out was his gift for painting, and even that wasn’t really all that good.

His brothers are stronger than he is. They can throw sacks of flour around all day. Peeta can, too, but they can beat him in an arm wrestling contest any day of the week. They’re just as good at baking as he is, but he’s better at decorating. 

Decoration is not a useful skill to have, in the long run. His brothers like to remind him of that. His mother encourages them. His father doesn’t stop them. But at least he can make the cake look pretty, even if he isn’t as strong or as fast or as good at baking. He’s useful in that small way. It’s enough.

When he’s five, he meets Katniss Everdeen for the first time. Even at five, he knows that meeting her is a pivotal point in his life. He knows that this is a girl he could die for. He knows that this is a girl he would do anything for.

She sings, and Peeta listens, and he’s a goner.

When he’s eleven, it rains. Hard.

He’s being an idiot on one particular day, or so his mother tells him. He messes up the icing, he doesn’t close the garbage cans so some looter starts rooting through them, and, worst of all, he burns the bread so badly that there’s no way the Mellarks can sell it.

His mother gets angry at him for it. Orders him to give it to the pigs. He’s too afraid to do anything but obey her, so he runs outside, sans raincoat, and starts breaking up the bread. At least the rain hides his tears.

If she ever finds out it was on purpose- Peeta shudders at the thought, and keeps his unbruised eye out for the girl with dark hair.

He finds her again about five minutes into his little pity party for himself. He hadn’t seen her at school recently. He’d heard about the mine collapse, and her dad. He wished that he’d had the courage to say something to her about it. But that would be weird, wouldn’t it?

He watches her out of the corner of his eye. What was she doing? She had some scraps of cloth in her hands. Was she selling the cloth?

As he watches, hands mechanically ripping apart the loaves and tossing them to the pigs, Katniss slumps down on the ground.

Peeta remembers the sunny day in kindergarten. The conversation he’d had with his father. The swooping feeling in his stomach when he listened to her sing for the first time, with the birds outside falling silent so that they, too, can experience the beauty of her voice. That happy, singing girl is nowhere to be seen, now.

He wonders if she’ll ever come back.

Before he can think better of it- before he can wonder if his mother is watching him through the windows to make sure he doesn’t mess up even more, he tosses the remains of the burnt loaf towards Katniss.

It’s the least he can do, he reminds himself as he turns to go back inside. It really is.

He is sixteen years old when Reaping Day for the Seventy-Fourth Hunger Games arrives. 

He gets dressed slowly. There’s a pit in his stomach. He knows that he probably won’t be called up. His brother has more slips than he does. Gale Hawthorne has more slips than he does. The odds are in his favor.

That knowledge doesn’t stop him from staring down at his breakfast bleakley. He eats mechanically, because his mother is staring at him with death in her eyes, and leaves the kitchen as soon as possible. He might as well get some work in before the Reaping.

When the Reaping does come, Peeta makes his way to the eligible boys’ sector and tries not to think about what will happen if his name is called.

“As usual, ladies first!” Effie Trinket trills, and Peeta tries to swallow. He fails.

She calls up Primrose Everdeen, and Peeta feels his heart jumping in his chest. Everdeen- no. No, no, Katniss would be crushed.  _ Everyone _ would be crushed. Prim was like a beacon of light in District Twelve, all smiles and idealism. There was no way she would survive the Hunger Games.

He can hear people gasping and muttering around him, but otherwise, it’s dead silent.

Katniss breaks the silence. She volunteers.

Peeta’s heart stops.

Oh. 

No.

No, no, no, no, no.

Not Katniss, not Katniss, not Katniss.

Peeta takes a quick breath. He’d known Katniss might be called. It was a risk all of them took. He’ll be okay in a few months. He should have known not to get so attached to a girl he’d never even spoken to. He should’ve remembered the possibility of the Games.

But he didn’t, and he can feel his heart being squeezed by some invisible hand.

Effie Trinket is simpering up on the stage, trying to get them to cheer for Katniss, but Peeta isn’t paying attention. District Twelve never cheers for their tributes. District Twelve never cheers for the Capital’s sick games.

And then, somehow, his day gets  _ worse _ .

His name is called.

The boys around him relax and start looking around for him, the unlucky winner. For a moment, all Peeta can do is stand there, mouth open, frozen. Is this what Prim had felt like? Cold all over? He glances at his brothers, then looks ahead at the stage.

He walks towards the stage.

Nobody calls after him.

Nobody volunteers to take him out of the death match.

_ Selfish _ , his mind hisses.  _ Wanting other people to die so you can be happy _ . He doesn’t know if his thoughts are directed towards himself or his brothers.

When he gets to the stage, he hesitates and turns to look at the crowd. His brothers are looking down. He isn’t Prim. Nobody loves him enough to volunteer for him. He is going to the Hunger Games.

He walks up onto the stage. The world is silent.

Peeta tries and fails to swallow again. He looks out at the crowd. There’s still time. Someone can volunteer. As long as he’s on this stage-

“-And may the odds be ever in your favor!”

Peeta shuts his eyes.

The odds aren’t in his favor. He knows that. He can bake, and he can paint, and nobody volunteered for him. Nobody.

He is sixteen years old.

Peta looks out at the crowd, and hopes that he’ll die quickly.

**Author's Note:**

> What did you think?


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